Struggling to know what the signs he’s not the right man for you are? Take a look at this article to find out what they are and the best ways to deal with them.
Everybody wants to find “the one” when it comes to relationships, but the reality is often disappointing. Sometimes, you may find yourself asking what the signs he’s not the right man for you are and what you can do about them.
The answers to these questions are often complicated and may even force you to face some harsh truths. You probably also wonder where to start since love is a vast topic and there are no set rules or guides. Read up on this article if that’s the case to gain a clearer insight into what it looks like when you are dating the wrong person.
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Signs He’s Not The Right Man For You
1. Your Personalities Don’t Match
You don’t need to date someone who shares all your interests and habits. There’s nothing wrong with having differences in your personalities. However, these characteristics should complement each other and help make you better people, not irritate and cause arguments.
It’s vital that you both can communicate and find common ground. If you find it difficult to enjoy the other person’s company, it’s time to reconsider the relationship.
Moreover, your partner should love and appreciate your quirks, not just tolerate them. They don’t have to like everything about you, but at the minimum shouldn’t make you feel bad for being who you are. A relationship often requires compromise, but don’t feel like you need to change yourself entirely for somebody.
2. Your Family And Friends Don’t Like Him
Sometimes outsiders’ perspectives can be pretty helpful when deciding whether or not he’s the right one for you. When your loved ones tell you they don’t like your partner, take a minute to consider the reasons. Maybe they misunderstand his little quirks and flaws, but perhaps they can also objectively see things you are blinded to because of love.
Ask around amongst your closed circles for honest opinions. Remember to keep an open mind and don’t immediately take offense to negative thoughts. You don’t have to purely follow everything they say, but it’s a reliable guiding compass for when you don’t know what to do.
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3. He’s Not Who You Thought He Was
People can change quite a lot once you know them well. The longer you acquaint someone, the more of their true self you will see. Sometimes it’s just a few bad habits; other times, you find out they’re an entirely different person from when you first met.
In some cases, it may take a while to realize, and you hesitate owing to the history you two share. You may also want to stick around because you think it may be temporary. However, no matter the circumstances, you should walk away if the change in the person turns out to be negative.
4. He Doesn’t Value And Appreciates You
Respect is the key to any successful relationship, especially a romantic one. Someone who truly loves you will show their support and care throughout everything, from your everyday life to significant changes. He may offer constructive criticism, but he won’t belittle you, your choices, or your dreams. He also won’t have you make one-sided efforts and sacrifices to build the relationship.
There might be moments when he neglects or doesn’t treat you with the love you deserve. Understandably, there are busy phases in his life, but this shouldn’t become a pattern. It may be time to take a step back if you feel like you are constantly begging for his attention and appreciation.
5. You Don’t Trust Him
Lack of trust is one of the most obvious signs he’s not the right man for you. There could be multiple reasons for this. He may not be a very straightforward person, frequently hides things from you, or you could have caught him in a few white lies in the past. Whatever it is, he has proven to be unreliable, and now you have a hard time putting faith in him.
Before jumping straight to conclusions or making hasty decisions, have a serious talk first. Let him know how his actions affect you, and ask him to be more forthright in the future. If you have tried this and he still doesn’t change, it’s time to go.
6. You Don’t Want The Same Future
At some point, you will need to discuss how your relationship fits into your future plans. It could be something major like a wedding and kids, but also more short-term events like holidays, road trips, or meeting the family. These situations signify great changes and deepen the connection between the both of you.
There could be an issue if your ideas don’t align, or one of you wants more than what the other person is willing to give. The general thought of further commitment with him could also freak you out or bore you. Be honest with yourself and with him about what you want so you can either work things out or end the relationship amicably.
7. You Have Different Moral Beliefs
The more you spend time with someone, the more you learn about their point of view on important issues, such as politics, human rights, equality, etc. Even though this seems irrelevant at first, it matters a lot since it reflects their core values and characters. It may even tell you whether they are a good person or not.
You two must believe in the same things, or you will frequently feel frustrated in the long run. You may get into many dead-end arguments or even bring out the worst in each other. It’s best to end things early on when you find it difficult to see things the way he does.
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8. You Can Picture A Life Without Him
Everyone in your life plays a different yet irreplaceable role, including your partner. Think about your life if he isn’t in it. Do you have trouble moving on, or would you feel normal about it? The latter means he doesn’t bring much of a change to your daily life.
The relationship could have gone stale, or you two simply aren’t compatible enough. Either way, don’t feel too bad about wanting to break up in case you don’t see the further potential.
What To Do When You Think He’s Not The Right Man For You
1. Pay Attention To The Small Things
Most relationship changes don’t happen overnight, and they may not be permanent either. Don’t wait until more significant issues have happened to reevaluate your relationship. Take notice of the little things instead, such as his caring gestures, whether he seems distracted, his bad habits, or any external reason that might be causing you both to feel unstable.
One important thing to remember is you can’t be the only one searching for answers to your relationship questions. Talk it out with your partner, ask them to share their perspectives, and see whether the problems are something you can work out together.
Read more: What guys want most in a relationship
2. Trigger His Hero Instincts
A study published in the Physiology & Behavior journal has shown that men are genetically wired to be protective over their loved ones. As a result, they are more likely to seek out relationships that make them feel needed. Intrinsically, they want to protect you from both physical and emotional harm and make sure you are properly cared for.
This is not a matter of personality but boils down to his genes, which explains why a man falls for a woman. The fact is that he will be into someone that lets him be the protector. In other words, they want to be your hero.
In this day and age, this may sound a bit unnecessary because the modern woman is just as capable as anybody. However, you can be independent and still give your man a chance to bring out his natural hero instinct.
Let him prove he could keep you safe, both physically and emotionally. It could be an excellent reminder of why you fell in love with him in the first place and a great indicator of whether he’s the right one for you.
If hero instinct sounds like a stranger to you, refer to this video for a deeper insight and pave the way to your dot-on man. If you are still in doubt, here is a review so you can have a better insight into this amazing guide.
3. Take An Overall Look At Your Relationship
Some relationships are fun at the moment, but they aren’t meant to last, while others could have the potential to become the love of your life. Take a moment and reflect on the nature of your relationship with him. Look at your reasons for dating, expectations, the depth of the connection, and whether you truly understand each other.
Having a thorough understanding of your relationship can help you decide whether the person is right. For example, he could be a perfectly good guy, but he may not be fit for a long-term relationship or give you what you need at the moment. Whatever the reason is, you should end things if you find that the relationship isn’t going in the direction you want.
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4. Trust Your Heart
By the end of the day, your heart knows best what you need and want. You find yourself looking for signs he’s not the right man for you because instinctively, you already know he’s not. Maybe you don’t have a specific name or reason for this feeling, and you can’t understand where it comes from either.
Trust your emotions and trust yourself to make the right decision. You may feel guilty or afraid to break up because there’s no clear reason to. However, the longer you stay, the more unhappy you will be. Don’t hesitate to walk away if you truly believe it’s something you should do.
Read also: 18 things to avoid doing on your first date
There’s no definitive answer to this question. The most important factor, however, is just to be yourself. The right person will come along and love you for all that you are.
In the meantime, work on self-improvement and try to understand yourself better. Relationships can be hard work, so long-term commitment will be easier and more certain if you are secure and stable.
Many struggle between being direct and delicate when it comes to breaking off romantic relationships. There’s no easy way to approach this topic without hurting the other person; however, you can minimize the damage by doing it the right way.
Be honest and tell him how you feel, but don’t be cold and completely put the blame on him. Choose your words carefully to let him know the problems and why you think it’s better to be friends or acquaintances. Let him express his thoughts and see things from his point of view. As you are mindful of his feelings, also keep yours in consideration. Try not to let him make you feel guilty for doing what’s best for you.
The timelines for relationship milestones are different for everybody. Some people know right away their new partner is their perfect match; others need much longer. The same goes for identifying when someone isn’t suitable for you. It could take years to realize or maybe just the first few dates. You could also change your mind as you mature. So don’t rely too much on the length of time and focus on your feelings instead.
Heartbreaks can be quite messy and hurtful for all parties involved. However, hanging onto a relationship that is neither fulfilling nor brings you happiness only makes things worse. It may be challenging, but when there are signs he’s not the right man for you, a break-up might just be needed.
Saying goodbye could be the better option for both of you in the long run. You will have learned some valuable lessons about love, and hopefully, when the next person comes around, they will be your perfect match.